The days can be long.

It's 6pm. Is he napping? Nope. I'm hearing little noises in the monitor....

(later)

The days can be long lately. Even with an activity in a given day - visiting a friend, going grocery shopping, going for a morning walk or run - the late afternoon and early evening hours seem to stretch out too far. And I feel alone. Eric gets home usually just in time to hold Brennan a minute, change his diaper, feed him, and put him to bed. Until then, I have to try to figure out what to do with this dear little guy who doesn't want to play on his playmat, doesn't want to have a book read to him, doesn't want to watch Gilmore Girls with Mommy, doesn't want to be held, doesn't want to be put down, and doesn't want to nap. It's not that he's crying or screaming or anything. He's just tiring.

I feel lost sometimes. I'd like to blog, but I am never sure if I'll have the time or not - will he nap longer than 40 minutes? Or should I nap? Or should I do some laundry? Or prepare some dinner? My sister-in-law is taking a photo a day - almost every one gorgeous and artistic and creative. I'm hardly taking photos of Brennan, much less anything else. It's hard when he can't sit up yet and mostly hates tummy time longer than 2 minutes.

Today I went into his room while he was napping, picked him up, and just rocked with him for 20 minutes or so. Cried a little bit. And smiled some. It was a nice moment in the long day.